To a little laugh!!!

[NGC]

But from the - beauty, with the round, the young
Question: - Why Hitler did put an end to himself?
Response: - To it sent counts at the point of the gas…
How do differ masculine cowards from female?
- Before masculine cowards climb by struts, and beside the female - by hands…
Advertisement: New of air with the aroma of the hemp
(So above its you still never they laughed.)
Announcement on the forum of the acquaintances:
“The young girl of 25 years from the intelligent family with two higher education will be introduced down the young person by that loving art, that are examined the philosophy of Kant and Nietzsche, disagreeing with the theory of Darwin and who found errors in the theory of relativity Of .
P.S. write to , and that to greatly is desirable!!! “
The strongly peasant goes before female dress and he begins there to cast.
All around the disturbance:
- Where you did arrive? Here only for the women!
Peasant with the offense indicating which keeps before the hand:
- This, it does request itself, for whom???

[Odministratol]

How girl it does differ from knight?
- Knight fights to the latter drop of the blood, and girl - to the first.





Before the struts there is no difference, the difference between them.
- What is champagne?
- Fluid for removing the woman.
- What is fellow soldier?
- This is the man, who can throw only one stick.

[Valson]

At the point of ignorance of men they pay by innocence, at the point of ignorance of women - by fate.
All women dream about the affectionate and tender lover.
H, unfortunately, in affectionate and tender men already is lovers.
- Again this burden before the stomach. Surely examinations, stress!
- It is agreeable, Masha, it will suffice itself to kill…
Bell on the radio:





Professor writes beyond the board for the sake of nonferrous chalks. Vote from the posterior numbers:
- Professor, then that on the board azure - evidently!
- Azure can change seats down the first row…
- Allo, this bureau of special personal services?
- Yes, what to you it is must?!
Two intellectuals:
- You will forgive, if you allow, I, based on your permission, will use…





But please?
- You will forgive, but this is inadmissible!
Will sail p of p to the egg cell. p dreams:
- I, if to p, I to camp by p! Biting, soldiers I will command…
p:
- Yes this is all! Here is I, if to p, I by principal p to camp! p, all power in me will be…
p:
- Yes not. Entire not that! Here is I, if to p, I by military to camp, and you down then everything will be subordinated…
Here them p p, that floats before p p:
- Gentlemen of p, will permit reporting - we in ! …
The militiaman of auto- with the blond above the control stops.
M: - Your laws, if you please.
B: - What?
M: - Laws, if you please.
B: - What are of law?
M: - This is this thing with your photograph.
B: - . (It rummages before its bag. Obtains mirror). If you please.
M: (It looks before the mirror) - H, however, that you did not immediately say that you are militiaman.
Lecturer before the kolkhoz pronounces the speech:
- At present some pessimistic disposed elements catastrophically mystify pathologic abstraction. This phenomenon is possible from the point of view of commonplace concept. But you as do consider comrades collective farmers?
Collective farmer arises, manure based on the felt boot of and it answers:
- Such a one it so, therefore what is to be done that cannot, if anything yes it was not. And not because it generally, but when it that, here then it and if you please.
New teacher simply tormented with the 1- class, for help to the director. It listened, and he says:
- Children must be only interested!





It is healthy !
- Is healthy, !
- Weakly down the globe to tighten?
- What is globe?
- A about this to you will describe your new teacher!
Two peasants on the track vote. They cost for long, there are no vehicles. Suddenly peasant with the control from KamAZ (Kama Automobile Plant) runs out besides the dark. The screech of brakes simulates and stops near them.
- That, peasants, problem? Give I will deliver.
- You that, fool that whether, travel further. We here themselves somehow.
That obtains barrel and shouts:
- It is rapid beside the vehicle!
Peasants frightened, they broke into a run with it by number.
They run… kilometers 5 they ran… here again the screech of the brakes:
- You hear, peasants, soon post traffic control, but i laws do not have. You now leave, and I along the maize field beside the detour, through the kilometer I will select you. Were gladdened peasants, that they from the fool.





You , us here under the muzzle of pistol 5 km peasant forced to run!
- With the control from KamAZ?
- Yes!
- Where it!? We have long ago sought it, it without the laws drives!
- Along the maize field it broke into a run, nothing understanding, they answer peasants. Traffic cop is sufficient control from the motorcycle and it shouts:
- You are set, now we it will overtake! One from behind, another beside the cradle!
- You that, peasant, fool?
That is sufficient automatic machine and it yells:
- It is rapid on the places! One , another beside the cradle!
It can't be helped - “mudflow” peasants on the places.
They run three together along the maize field. Traffic cop yells down one:
- You that do make!? You before the cradle! Why on the straight struts? Rapidly be filled up!
Peasant runs on the halfbent struts, beginnings to him face impact, nothing it sees, struts ache, it is turned to the friend on the rear seat and says:
- Down *** - zh they were grafted, they would go to itself peacefully on KamAZ!

[Valson]

Children of down the excursion beside the police.
On the panel they hang the photograph: “Them seeks the police”.
:
- This here of these seek?
Cop:
- Yes! Their very!!!
:
- Here are cops, pancake! What zh you of them, when they did photograph, did not tie????





Girl- programmer, recently moved out marry, it writes mother on the electronic post office:
- Mom, my husband he proved to be by the sex offender! It requires sleeping with it everywhere: on the kitchen, before the tank, on the window-sill and even at the point of of of of …
It is well known that: Spaniard - man, and Spaniard - influenza; American -
man, and American woman - billiards table; Indian - man, and turkey - bird; the Korean
- man, and - food; Bulgarian - man, and Bulgarian - tool; Finn
- man, and Finn - knife; a Pole - man, and Polish woman - dance; Turk - man,
and Turk - vessels; Dutchman - man, and Dutchwoman is furnace; Hungarian - man,
and Hungarian - drain; resident of Leningrad or - man, and Leningrader or
- preference; Czechs and Vietnamese - people, and Czech woman and - foot-wear;
Chinese - man, and nankeen - apple; Moldavian - man, and Moldavian -
Odessa area. And only one exception: Moscovite - man, and Muscovite -
bucket with the nuts

[Odministratol]

Falcon, oh gladdened! Good fellow

[Valson]

New Russian emigrant writes wife beside New York:
“Loved, in this month I cannot send to you money. It dispatches 100 kisses instead of. Alex.”
Wife answers:
“Thanks, native, at the point of 100 kisses! Here is report about the expenditures.
1. milkman agreed down 2 kisses at the point of the bottle of milk at the day.
2. electrician agreed only by afterward 7ths.
3. owner of house comes each day above his 3 kisses.
4. owner of grocery bench does not take only as far as kisses. It was necessary to give something still…
5. other expenditures - 40 kisses. Do not survive, in me still it remained 35 to the end of the month. To plan the same down the following?
Fellow on the party:
- Girl, you do drink?
- No.
- A why?
- Problems with the struts.
- That, they are mowed away?
- No. They depart.
- Light, I got tired, I no longer can! already 3 hours of night! give to sleep!
- you will have time, give still one…
- Light, we negotiated - ten.
- where ten, there even eleven. where eleven, there even twelve
- but I actually no longer can!!!
- I can I do not can… to the wedding it was necessary speak “I cannot”. !
- no, light, give let us agree: one - and all.
- well good, good… let us paste on still one and to sleep.





Today our sponsor - new laxative “”. And I do not manage
to present the question…
Comes mom by lady it sees son it sits before the cooler it eats damp
Mom: - , you them although boiled
Son: - who did season a pipe???
But you do wish to go in Cyprus?
To rest at the health resorts of the Mediterranean? Gather 11 green paper slips with Franklin's portrait, they arrived against us - and perhaps to you it will transport!
Great Britain. Forensic recording by 12509. Affair of pregnant woman.
Woman approximately on the eighth month of pregnancy sat down beside the bus. She noted that the man on the contrary looks against it and smiles. It immediately changed seats before another place. Man smiled more widely, woman again changed seats. Man of beside entire mouth. When woman changed seats 4th time, the man of down entire bus. She complained herself to driver and man was arrested. The case was transmitted beside the court.
Justice did request man (approximately years of twenty), that he can say in his justification?
“Well, your honor, everything was approximately thus: when woman visited beside the bus, I could do nothing, but noted its condition. It sat down under the advertizing sign, which stated “double mint Gemini on the approach”, and I smiled. Then it changed seats before the place under the sign “the ointment of slogan it will decrease the neoplasm”, and I was forced to smile. Then it transferred itself down the place under the sign “the great stick of William it did its matter” (Willim `s Of ig Of stik of did to th Of rik), and I hardly contained itself. But when fourth time it changed seats and proved to be under the sign “rubber Of gdr it could stave off this accident” I it fell. (Gdr Of rubbr of uld to hv of rvntd of this of idnt).”
Justice: IT IS JUSTIFIED!

[NGC]

This I fell!!! Lethal hitching post!!!!!

[NGC]

Operating. Surgeon - to anesthesiologist:
- Why patient even before the consciousness?
- Because you beside it another scalpel did not insert!

[NGC]

chi -!!! I think to no one it requested….

[NGC]

Urological operating. Lies patient, prepared to the operation. Very young . Enters surgeon with the washed out hands, before the sterile gloves.
- Nurse, repair member. … N- yes… But now to patient.

[NGC]

another honey of the forum:
Optimus on October 23, 2007 before the 00:19: 11 it is inactive
I am met for the sake of the girl already more than year! Sex is regular… (2-3 times a week) but here is the problem: it why that does not end, when we deal for the sake of sex (even hour not end- I, while she nevertheless does not reach the orgasm! I excite it well, wet entire becomes, passion before the eyes, the hands and tele- in it appears!) But with the oral sex it ends in one-and-a-half minutes can a little more!!! here it is necessary to make for the sake of it , and then also itself I try to take pleasure, but as the not that! Indeed it wishes normal sex also, well before the meaning oral that the girl would end when you before it!) Here is this ! Who can, he knows or it encountered help!!!!! What I should make??
the author: KWIRINGS on October 23, 2007 before the 04:11: 38 it is inactive
Not , all . in all women vagina at first induces . clitoris to stimulate during the sexual Act (down it is possible to put on special ).
the author: asd111 on November 1, 2007 before the 15:11: 30 it is inactive
itself you )) put on to itself special - calculus on the rope and jump beside the river!!

[NGC]

The brigade of medical students will cure girls and young women from: claustrophobia, , obtrusive movements, schizophrenia, depression, headache, insomnia, intervertebral rupture, youthful eels, nettle rash, stuttering. Treatment is free. of the client

[Valson]

Can even they will not cure, but they will greatly try

[NGC]

They brought beside the squad of neurosurgery somehow of years under 90 with the neoplasm before the head. They shaved head, also, down the operating table. Operation - the trepanation of skull - and no one especial- that and hoped at the point of the happy end, but there was no other selection. It is late
in the evening ram came to from anesthesia, and beside dress - bare, bald, with the bandaged head, with the bloody maculae. It falls beside masculine dress. There before shade on the mesh sits the convalescent of with the urological problems and finishes drinking the flagon of cologne. Stock
it is filled up by number. Peasant here loses consciousness, he falls beyond the floor.
After celebrating its needs, stock is returned down the place, but it makes mistakes by door and falls before the masculine House. Against that place, where stock must lie, the elderly peasant, who already the pair of years was not bent and was not straightened because of the severe form of osteochondrosis, dozed by heavy sleep. Ram begins to silently strip blanket based on it. Peasant is spilled, sees improbable spectacle, it jumps and it begins to yell for the sake of the superhuman vote:
- Lads! Above me death is alien!!!!
First reacted very strong fellow with the broken neck, plastered to the flange itself. He at one stroke knocks before the door, but he is missed and falls beside the closed glass shutter, which it resounds into smithereens. Noise, dust, glass, cry. Someone began to bawl: “Fire!!!” And here
it were begun. The people overturned from the Houses who as it can: who on the wall, who on , who crawling, re-bandaged, plastered, on the skids. One re-bandaged to the eyes themselves g patient the terrible cry was thrust beside the staff physician, where the young on duty doctor fried on the writing desk nurse. The physicians here were cemented from the nerve of upheaval. But ram meanwhile it calmed down itself before the recaptured place and peacefully it fell asleep ".

[NGC]

Students of the first course of medical school in practice in the morgue (for the first time).
Doctor stands near the rugged twig and he says:
- You will memorize, doctor must be very attentive and it is complete not
squeamish. Here you look!
And pushes finger beside the posterior passage opening of twig, then
it extracts, it licks it and says with relish:
- Well and the now small testing: who will repeat, that will be doctor…
Students before the shock. Somewhat do not maintain and run out besides the morgue.
Only one excellent worker was called and repeated also the very, but already with another
by the expression of face. Doctor:
- Yes… Well from you- that already precisely doctor will not come out… I said that
doctor must be attentive: I indeed pushed finger one, and he licked
another…

[NGC]

Before the medical school the professor of a question to the students:





erotic excitation?
Girl before the first row:
- CHI- CHI.
Professor:
- Girl! 5 are increased pupils, and CHI- CHI
only 2 times…
Armenian passes examination in the anatomy before the medical school.
It extracts “H OF SEXUAL H”. It is prepared against the table.
Professor to it:
- The student Of ! You will discontinue to peep beside the crib!

[NGC]

Occurred this before N - to urban hospital. Before the surgical squad works nurse , who is too not friends with the head, moreover it works already long ago, not novice.
And here, it enters the squad of patient with the intestinal impassability (this when contents of intestine at the point of the different reasons it cannot it leave). The evening, the end of workday, the doctor in attendance tells this :
- Acted do three or four enemas.
And it goes away home. In the morning patient meets it before the corridor on the bending themselves struts and after keeping at the point of the wall:
- Doctor, however, that you with me make?!
Initially doctor did not comprehend before what matter. Morning planning session afterward begins, and this reports:
- To patient was assigned of enema, but 34 I to do did not have time, she did only 24 or 25…
-?!! …
However, concerning that it was necessary to pass to poor patient!

[NGC]

in the hospital… have we resuscitator on the surname Drozdov. And riot he sits somehow before the staff physician, and telephone rings.
Resuscitator takes tube and he says: Resuscitation, Drozdov.

[Odministratol]

Real history from the life. To me it was years 7 8. they went somewhere before the train. Before the sleeping compartment I with dad and 2 additional peasants. They ate, I on the upper flange sleep, and they beside the maps…
The sleeping compartment of № 1 near the guides, was with the knob. If it is slammed shut, it is opened only outside. Therefore small fissure always remained.
At night I am spilled from the fact that the door was opened. Goes woman before the night jacket, door begins to flap and it begins to pull at peasant on the second upper flange:
- You what beyond my place lay, arise…
All , and it with the wild cry tries to open door, strikes beside it by arms and struts.
All as horses. Even guide, when was opened door.
Science: if at night you go to write, then:
- memorize the place
- dress, at least a little.

[Valson]

Student () c examination, and (P) it brings down…
P: - H is good, if you answer this question - the c… It is how much before this audience of bulbs?
: (rapidly it computed) - 9
P: - H - 10 (it obtains from bulb) - not !
, to the situation… of assigns a question…
: (without a moment's hesitation) - 10
P: - H, is incorrect, I today bulb did not take…
: (extracting bulb besides the pocket) - then I took)
Fall… It darkens… VA and beckoning they are returned based on the field on its vehicle, filled for the sake of hay…
Being tired, VA climbed up down the top itself in order to snooze, and beckoning villages at the point of the reins. Beckoning with the fear it shouts after a certain time:
- VA! VA! Motorcyclist without the head recently passed!
- Yes you chase, fool! Do not prevent me from sleeping! It again with the fear shouts after a certain time:
- VA!!! Again passed motorcyclist without the head!!!
- Pancake, well you that was superheated?!! Tomorrow to the doctor…
Are past five minutes and…
- VA! Passed still one motorcyclist without the head - in reality, I greatly fear!!!
- Well it is agreeable - now let us look…
It is raised. They wait - and finally from behind motorcyclist passes them - and actually WITHOUT THE HEAD!!!
Beckoning:
- Not, well you see, I spoke, I spoke, but you - was imagined!
- Well you and fool, beckoning! Sand bar- that beside retract…
Peasant on the motor pool goes, he looks attractions. It sees, in one -
vast turn, the pile of people… Well, bought ticket, it arose before the turn,
it stands, stands. Well here already almost fits its turn, it looks -
the peasant before it bends head and slides in beside the aperture in the wall
house, by then sharp movement it puts out and runs at the point of the house. Well,
peasant, naturally, before - that such. It fits, it slides in
head, and here it someone on the head by strut as %!!!
Peasant with the thoughts - well I will find, who imbedded - I will kill, bypasses the house
and it sees - based on the other side there is nothing, only wall, before it hole,
and there whose- that head ...........
They were met somehow Clinton, if and Putin. And they tell each other about the most terrible case from their career.
Clinton:
- Well means it placed I beyond the table Monica give it to fry. I here hear before the corridor steps… they are opened door and before the room they go the senators with the journalists. We hardly had time to do a form, that let us examine office!!
If:
- A I decided to somehow look before Bundestag, here is opened door, and in me as panel to spite caught… I hardly had time to run so far in the presence of tele-KA and to draw from the rosette cord!!!!
Putin:
- A we somehow mudflow with Yeltsin at the point of the table in the Kremlin. and only Boris Nikolayevich began to pour, door when suddenly is opened, Berezovsky appears against the threshold and he begins to shout: “Boris Nikolayevich, raise sleeve!!!!” Yeltsin: “That, to say toast?” Berezovsky: “What of toast??!!! Sleeve on the nuclear button stands!!!”
Two students come down the professor to pass examination. On the combinational analysis. Before those other times. Home they arrived against the professor. Well, they passed, passed, above the maps they sat too long, above the bones playing, it darkened. But at that time both students and professors were poor, them you will not home transmit, it was necessary to sleep to pack before the professorial three-room apartment. In one room - two students, before another - professor with the wife, before the third - professorial daughter. Entire rank on the rank, they sleep.
Is spilled student, he thinks, and horseradish whether I with this I lie, go- kiloamperes professorial daughter to . beside one room - besides under the blankets , well that is professor with the wife, beside another - one head. Daughter! It is brisk to it under the blanket, they sleep.
It will not sleep and to professor. It arises among the night, give, he thinks, to the daughter I will pour elsewhere, it is small that from these to wait. beside one room, two heads, aha, students, beside another - one, daughter, not otherwise. - will sleep.
Well, mulberry and second student it awoke, and, as you has already been conjectured, it was transmitted on the feet of friend, at the point of the searches of professorial daughter.
Morning. Professor is spilled. One. In the room of students. … Glances beside one room - there student with the daughter, beside another - student with the wife. It cards the turnip:
- How many years I teach combinational analysis, but such **** of readjustments yet it did not see!!!

[Valson]

In the juvenile small garden the children suddenly began to be scolded by matte finish. Governess goes before
the military unit, from which came two soldiers to mend wiring and
it complains down local authorities. Authorities drafts to itself two Privates,
those directly mended wiring it requests:





There is in no way! Only here is one time, when Private Ivanov stood on the staircase and
wires were soldered, and I kept staircase, tin began down to drip. So I to it thus
and he said: ``Private Ivanov, really you do not see that the pieces of that fused
metal they fall beyond the head of your combat comrade?! ``
New modification of Kalashnikov automatic rifle -47
The caliber is a little reduced in comparison with the previous model, magazine is reduced, barrel is build it the corps, is added the illumination of hammer and the function of bluetooth.
H they confuse the absence of Fermium- radio and MP3-, and also hovering during the switching from the automatic beside the single regime. The built-in 1,3 mega-pixel camera with 5 multiple will make it possible to take pleasure by bent faces of enemies, mounted down the renovated active bayonet based on 3- by the regimes of vibration.
Device has the stylish shock-proofed corps and hinged butt, and also loud pyrotechnic signal with the illumination by green rocket.
Quantity of the plays: it is not limited.
As a whole, the model came out very balanced on the price/to quality, which will undoubtedly make it popular among the users of standard 5,45.
Young fellow in the cafe drinks coffee and looks against the beautiful girl above the adjacent mount. Finally it decides to approach:
- Girl, and it is possible to you to squat?
Girl down all cafe:
- YES I WILL NOT WITH YOU SLEEP!!!
People , they . Fellow after reddening it is returned to its mount. Here the same girl helps mount to it
- You, of course, will excuse, but matter before the fact that I psychologist write abstract beyond the theme: “The behavior of the different types of people before the inadequate situations…”
Fellow, suddenly, down all cafe:
- THAT?! TWO HUNDRED BAXES?!
Matter was in the magazine, where sell audio and video of dispenser, disks and so forth goes once before this magazine man and he in the salesgirl:
- Girl, and in you the recording “of dune” exists?
Girl, a question did not apparently comprehend, but after passing preliminarily the pile “of trainings for the sellers” - it reacted instantly:
- Pass, if you please, beside the following department, there they “” have, can and “” are… but if not, that they them to you they will order!





- this those, who absorb down the hearing. - absorb by eyes. But by the skin and by body… So here, it is simple of . Too many people thus far before the signal panel will not obtain, does not understand!
Court rooms, the justice:
- Well, responder, as the saying goes, to you plaintiff…
Competition in Moscow down the construction of supermarket is declared. They seek contractors. Sits manager and examines sentence. Turk first goes.
- You did acquaint for the sake of the project?
- Yes.
- I at the point of what sum are ready to construct?
- At the point of 1 million dollars.
- Is good, thanks, we will examine your sentence.
Then the German goes:
- Name your price at the point of the construction.
- 2 million dollars!
- A why so is much?
- The quality of execution plus periods!
The Russian goes:
- At the point of what price you are ready to construct?
- 3 million dollars!
- A why so multi-TO!? - Well as why: 1 million me, 1 million - to you, and at the point of 1 million Turks will construct.
Comes, which means, (i.) beside the bath, he glances beside the window of the ticket office and requests cashier (k.):
(I.) - say if you please, bath does function?
(K.) - Ceva?
(I.) - does function your bath?
(K.) - Ceva- Ceva bath?
(I.) - does work bath?
(K.) - , certainly it works.
(I.) - To they are good, say, and hot water does circulate?
(K.) - Ceva?
(I.) - . Does circulate hot water?
(K.) - water?
(I.) - water exists?
(K.) - , certainly there is, water- that. Down that bath.
(I.) - To they are courteous, give to me entrance ticket down one person.
(K.) -??? But you , peasant, wash will not be?
Surprising matter: it is not possible to buy health - and to pay for the sake of it is possible
as much as desired!

[Odministratol]

the recording “of dune” - this something